Ice

Oh no, Mr. Bill! We got ice - shut the city down.

I understand that a) we don't have the city resources to take care of a major ice storm, b) not many people down here know how to drive in ice and c) it's a nice excuse to take off.

But really, come on, this is not a major ice storm, is it? I've lived through worse. This is nothing. For all you pansy-ass people who called in that you're not coming - you suck! Harsh, I know! But there I said it.